Trials & Tribulations, 안녕히가세요, and Prayer without ceasing

What is 안녕히가세요 you ask?  Well that would be "goodbye" in Korean because Karl and I found out last night that he will be moving to Korea and working there for 12 months starting in November.  And the worst part?  I can't go with him.  I'm heart broken and fighting tears as I type this.  Our emotions are so, so raw right now but it's important to me to continue to document our lives, this chapter included.  Let me back track... 


Yesterday my time with The Lord was about the peace that only He can give.  I read Isaiah 26 and my attention was really drawn to verse 3- "You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you."  Obviously this was no accident because about 6 hours later Karl and I were sitting in Chick-Fil-A and he hands me his phone and says, "so I just got an interesting email."  On his phone read, "Congratulations!  Sra Karl Burton, you have been assigned a new Permanent Duty Station.  Please log on to .... "(at this point, everything went blurry.  I swear.).  Basically, the rest of the email said that Karl had to log on to this website that he only has access to on the base in order to see where he would be going.  How cruel is that?  


And can I just vent for a second?  WHO ARE YOU KIDDING- CONGRATULATIONS SRA BURTON??  CONGRATULATIONS????  What exactly are you congratulating him on???  A year apart from his new bride?  Missing 365 days of their new life together?  Not being together for their second Christmas and anniversary and her 24th birthday and his 25th?  Forcing him back into dorm life as a 24 year old in a foreign country?  Well thank you, Uncle Sam, thank you for the congrats.  Actually no, thank you for the major slap in the face.  What a ridiculous email.  I would REALLY appreciate if someone would just get real and revise that email.  "We are so sorry to report that you have been assigned a new PDS."  That would make a world of difference... maybe. 


Back to last night... So obviously both of us had lost our appetites and we left Chick-Fil-A to go to the base to find out his new station.  So many thoughts were going thru my head- the options for where Karl can be stationed are actually pretty limited.  He can only go where F-16s are, such as Alaska, Vegas, Florida, Oklahoma (middle of NOWHERE in Oklahoma, not like Tulsa), Italy, Korea, and Germany.  I was convinced it wasn't overseas.  I thought it was going to be Alaska.  I am allergic to the cold.  Literally.  It's called cold urticaria and it's no joke.  I would rather it have been Alaska where I could go with him.  On the way to the base I couldn't find any words to pray except, "I trust you, I trust you, you know our hearts." Karl just kept sweetly reminding me that The Lord is in control.  I waited in the car while he went in to find out.  He got back in the car and just said, "it's Korea."  I lost it.  That is the one place that I can't go with him to.  I'm trying so hard to just suck it up for Karl, he is the one that has to go, not me.  


I am baffled, BAFFLED, by The Lord's plan.  Really.  Our 3 year dating relationship was 100% long distance... like, plane-style long distance, as in, across the country.  Apparently it isn't over.  Karl quickly reminded me how much worse our situation could be.  We could have much less time until he leaves.  He could be entering a war zone and fighting on the front line.  He could be sick with a much more uncertain future.  But he isn't.  Karl mentioned that my Pa went to Korea, fought, and he and Gammy "made it just fine."  Ha, that made me laugh because he and Gammy did quite a bit more than "made it just fine."  I woke up at 5:30 this morning and as I rolled over to go back to sleep it hit me.  I remembered that Karl is going to Korea.  For a year.  Without me.  This year.  In 8 months.  I heard Karl rolling around and he couldn't sleep either.


I have a lot of praying to do, as does Karl.  We can't spend the next 8 months awake at all hours of the early morning, restless and peace-less.  My prayer- that we would live presently and peacefully and without anxiousness.  Oh my, The Lord is at work and sometimes it scares me.


Hannah K.C. Burton