match day

No, Karl nor myself aren't entering/finishing med school, however, I feel like he is in the worst way.  Tonight he logs on to prioritize his preferences on where we will live once he is home from Korea.  There will be a list based on what bases currently have openings for his position and skill level and he will rank his preferences accordingly.  Then, between now & August or whenever Uncle Sam feels like it, Karl will get an email saying that he has orders ready at which point he can log on and see where our fate lies, literally, in what state- match day mismatch day.

I am a ball of nerves.  Why?  Because in the past month we learned that Ft. Worth has become an option for his job, they (whoever "they" is) have decided to have active duty personnel working the flight line at guard bases, enter Carswell JRB here in Ft. Worth.
Since I realized that I would marry a military man I have had lesson after lesson in letting go of control and giving it to God... and I'm starting to get the hang of it.  For the past 7 months I have seriously not cared where Karl & I are once he is home from Korea.  Like, OK Lord just take us where you want us!  I really don't care!  I am a feather to be blown in the breeze wherever, whenever.  Done & Done.  Oh, except starting last month when I realized all my worldly dreams can come true starting November 2012.  Keep my job,  continue being a regular part of Oliver & Baby Bowen's lives, buy a house, think about children of my own in possibly greater than or equal to 1-2 years icantbeliveisaidthat, not have to move twice in 2 years, Karl not have to take leave for us to see family on the weekend, the list goes on, y'all!
So clearly I ripped this right back out of God's hands, in which I had so delicately placed it, and have been tooling around with it in my own grimy paws for the past month.  Awesome.
To top it all off, Karl & I have not been able to communicate at all for the past week because he is in Japan working and it is a stagnant WiFi black hole.  I mean, aren't the Japanese known for their technology?  Come on.  So we just talked for 30 minutes while he ate ribs at Chilis.  And by "talked," I mean I typed on Skype while he verbally responded.  So he obviously looked like he really had it together to the nice folks trying to enjoy their meal around him hearing him randomly say things like, "well, it's just part of life."
...anywayz.  I feel like I am constantly being barraged by Satan trying to plant seeds of worry and doubt and fear about where we will or won't be in a few months and it is taking so much energy and focus to pray that away.  Woof.  I was reminded by a coworker (who was talking about something completely different) that God sees the big picture.  He isn't waiting to see where Karl gets orders to- He already knows.  I am SO SO thankful for that and needed to hear that right when I did last week.  So I can just rest, choose as wisely as possible alongside Karl as he prioritizes bases, and know that God works for the good and my good and hears my cries and knows my heart, no matter what... and by 'choose wisely' I mean make a list such as the one I've pictured below and send it to Karl to aid him in his decision making...

Thankful that He is the beginning & the end and I get to be sandwiched in the middle of that goodness.
Hannah K.C. Burton

will certainly update when Karl has orders!